Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Fear and the City

When I think about my daily interactions within Edmonton I rarely think of myself as pushing my own personal or the city’s limits. One could say I am moving about the city in a comfortable but stagnant cocoon. In this cocoon I slowly morph through new experiences and challenges but rarely venture outside of my comfort zone. Sure I love to try new foods, meet new people and hear new ideas but often I find sharing my own experiences or becoming inherently involved in new ventures daunting.

I often wonder how much of my day is guided by fear?

Fear of failure?
Fear of awkwardness?
Fear of the unknown?

Edmonton is such a community-based city.  Not so much geographically as Edmonton’s neighbourhoods can be distant and disjoined. The arts, gay, academic, athletic etc. communities on the other hand are seemingly tight knit. These communities all exist as a collective meeting place for people with specific interests and ideas. However, penetrating these communities and finding acceptance can seem difficult.

In this sense, fear is stifling my ability to experience what Edmonton has to offer. I go to shows, pubs and art openings but I have yet to feel an intrinsic connection within Edmonton’s various communities. Perhaps I am already immersed and just unaware or perhaps I am subtly holding myself back from truly becoming involved.

A friend of mine, Percy Marshall, recently tested out his theory on fear and I found it incredibly inspirational. Percy wanted to see if fear would completely disappear after he had conquered it. After deciding that his biggest fear was floating down the North Saskatchewan River on a floating section of ice, he did just that.

In conquering his fear, he was able to progress and propel himself past the restrictions of fear and self-doubt. His video documentary begins with the statement “Thoughts determine what you want, actions determine what you get.” I couldn’t agree more.

Perhaps I just need to face my fear and become more involved. I need to morph out of this stagnant state by putting my writing, art and self out there...wherever that may be. 

I guess this is a first step.

Hello Edmonton.

Please watch Percy Marshall's short documentary.
It is in 4 parts:

2 comments:

  1. Wow, that must have been so cold. How long ago did he do that?

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  2. It was the weekend of April 23rd, either saturday or sunday. The ice chunks were few and far between. Shortly after, the river became flooded with them, and today, the river lacks them entirely, although I suspect certain area of it are in abundance of the ice chunks.

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